We got into another all night fight again last night. This time it was because I was not into watching a movie and so I was playing a game on my phone. We fought until 7:30 this morning. He broke our closet door and a picture on our wall because I pushed him out of my face. He told me that if he were to walk out that door, he was going to call 911 and make a report that the girls were unsafe with me because he feels I am mentally unstable.
Today, we went to get family pictures done. I hate pretending that everything is fine when it is not. Our children have been crabby, and he tells me it is my fault because of what I am doing to our family.
I told Alex yesterday that he could read these. I am glad I have him as a friend, but I am a little worried that the things going on in both of our homes will tear apart our friendship. If Hubby does not want me on my phone to imessage and play my games, how and when will Alex and I talk? We cannot call eachother because his wife is suspicious that there is something going on. I really want to be friends with him, I like who I am with him. I am happy and cheerful.
I am going to try to make my marriage work, but I am not going to try forever. Either we are going to make it, or we are not. I will give my medication and counseling six months and if I am not happier with my marriage, I will be done.